The Passion Paradox

By wanting to live a passionate, fulfilling life you’ve already failed.

Now I don’t mean to be harsh. Your desire is natural – we all want a fulfilling, enjoyable life. I want it too.

But there’s something in the way you’re approaching the problem that’s getting in your way from the start.

Have you ever looked for you phone around the house?

But then after 10 minutes (3 of them involving screaming and cursing the gods above and throwing pillows at phantoms) you realize it’s right there in your hand?

Yeah. I’ve been there.

And it’s frustrating.

And it sucks.

But it’s a great experience. And here’s why.

Because while you may not have the house, the job, the sexy girlfriend/strong boyfriend you want, your life still has soooome passion and fulfillment even if you can’t think of it right now.

One of the keys to Unchaining your Passion (hehe see what I did there?) is realizing that the only one who can chain it is you.

There’s a phrase which is gaining traction here in the states in self-help books and seminars…

It’s simple, easy and short:

“I am enough.” ~Self-proclaimed self-help gurus like me.

“It sounds so cheesy, Joe! I don’t want to say that and feel silly…”

First of all, silly is a good thing. I just complemented my Krav instructor on being silly and he was confused – he thought it was a veiled insult… but no it’s a big complement when I say it.

And second of all – it’s the key.

See here in the States, and in many other countries as well, we have this thing called Capitalism.

I’m a fan, it’s one of the best ways to allow people to have open range for success if they earn it, options for the consumer, and also provide a sense of stability for the whole.

Yes, it’s not perfect. Yes, there are improvements that need to be made – some significant improvements, some small – but as a whole I’m a fan.

One of the side-effects of our form of Capitalism is something we call consumerism.

Did you ever see an ad saying

“Are you feeling good? Like you don’t need anything? Buy a Snicker’s bar!”



Well there’s a reason for that.

While happy people buy more, happy people who don’t think they need anything don’t.

If you don’t think you have a problem to solve, you won’t buy something that is supposed to solve the problem.

So instead, they say “Hungry? Buy a Snicker’s!”

While this is a small and not-so-harmful example, we’re bombarded with messages like these all day and all night.

We’re buzzed in the middle of the night by our phones which tell us we’re too fat and need a liposuction… No actually you need a virtual one-on-one nutritionist with 30-days free… No actually you need this new sex-god strategy because that’ll make you feel good about your body…

And then the penis-enlargement pills hit your inbox…

The average adult male penis is 5.16 inches. It took a looooong time for me to get all those measurements… ahem I mean I googled it.

But yet people who have 6-inch schlongs still desperately slam their fingers into the keyboard to order their pills…


Part of it is our insecurities, yes, but part of it is our culture of consumerism.

What’s the solution? Burn it down?

Well no. While we’re influenced by our culture, I (and most philosophers and psychologists) prefer the Ghandi approach.

The Ghandi Approach – Be the change you wish to see in the world.

Remember that phrase up there?

No, I’m not going to make you say it in front of the mirror every morning and call up your Mom, Dad, Friend, Lover, Doctor, Cat, Dog and 3rd grade teacher and shout it to yourself and everyone 10 times each.

But the meaning behind it is quite important.

You. Are. Enough.

In spite of all these ads telling you you don’t have what you want, you do.

If you go look for a passionate life, believing you don’t have one – you’re either going to feel more and more inadequate or you’ll have to blow up your identity to find it.

I’m not saying you might have to give up parts of your identity to grow.

And I’m not saying you have everything you want and you don’t have wants or desires. Because you might, and probably do. We all want more, it’s part of being human, and it’s a good thing.

Keep that desire burning, it’s another extremely important ingredient in living fully and passionately.

But that’s for another article.

In the process of us following our desires, we must accept that we have what we have, we are who we are, and be grateful for it – even if we’re on a path towards “more.”

Because without a foundation of “having,” nothing we gain will ever make us feel good and we’ll keep on clicking those pesky penis pill ads wondering why we’re not happy.

I hope I reached you in some way and helped you live passionately.

Until next time. Unchain your passion and live your most authentic and passionate life, readers.

Joe. Out.

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